One of Helen’s favorite places was the condo on Coronado Island. Here’s a photo we came across of Mom with her friends/fellow writers. Left to right: Helen, Pat Wright, Anne Farrell, Linda Prine. Linda McLaughlin is taking the photo. These 5 talented authors met every Friday for years.
Is this wierd, for me post another photo of the gravesite?
I just thought the combination of flowers that people had left for Mom looked so pretty, that they should adorn her website too.
Well, tomorrow it will be a month since Mom left us. I was feeling pretty sad this morning and happened to come across the prayer card Mom picked out when she was making advance arrangements. While she didn’t write the poem, I’m told that she changed it a little bit to her liking. I read the card today and remembered that these were the words she wanted us to read when we were grieving. I thought I would post it here for anyone who hasn’t read it or might want to read it again:
To Those I Love & Those Who Love Me
When I am gone, release me, let me go
I have so many things to see and do.
You mustn’t tie yourself to me with tears.
Be happy that we had so many years.
I gave you my love. You can only guess
How much you gave me in happiness.
I thank you for the love you each have shown,
But now it’s time I traveled alone.
So grieve a while for me if grieve you must
Then let your grief be comforted by trust.
It’s only for a while that we must part.
So bless the memories with your heart.
I won’t be far away, for life goes on
So if you need me, call and I will come.
Though you can’t see or touch me, I’ll be near
And if you listen with your heart, you’ll hear
All of my love around you soft and clear.
And then, when you must come this way alone,
I’ll greet you with a smile, and “Welcome Home.”
I’m always remembering now, bits of advice that Mom has given me over the years. This one pops into my head a lot lately: At one difficult point in my life, I was talking to my Mom on the telephone and she asked how I was doing. I told her I was doing okay, except that I would get very weepy and down when I listened to one particular song on the stereo. My mom gave me these simple instructions: “Don’t listen to that song anymore.”
Problem solved, I guess! She wasn’t being unsympathetic; just optimistic and practical. It makes me smile every time I think of it. It reminds me of that joke “Doctor, it hurts when I do this…”
The granite marker is now in place and the area is looking better. Weekends are a much more serene time to visit because the tractors and workers are gone.The cemetery has named “streets” throughout the grounds. Here’s how to find mom’s site there:
- From Van Buren, turn into the cemetery at Harmon.
- Turn right at the guard shack on Phillipine Street and take that road till it ends.
- Turn right on Meuse Argonne Ave.
- You will see where the grass ends and the new area is taking shape on the right hand side. Look for section 57B. I would say it’s on the West side of the cemetery.
If you bring any flowers or adornments for the gravesite, be sure to read their rules about what is allowed. They say no vases or potted plants. Today, I tried setting a potted Chrysanthemum plant there, thinking it might last longer than cut flowers. I’ll check back and see if they took it away. Seems to me they might cut the family some slack for awhile, at least until the grass is in. We shall see!
Here’s the first draft of Mom’s obituary that ran in the Orange County Register. The photo actually printed much better in the paper.
This is an email I sent to Mom in January 06 when I heard Mom’s cancer had come back.
I have been trying to make you a card all night but I’m just too inept to get it completed and sent as a card.
Words cannot express my love for you but a poem, I don’t know the author, from the movie “Patch Adams” w/ Robin Williams almost comes close. Maybe I mentioned it to you before:
” I love you,
I love you without knowing how or why or from where,
I love you without pride or complexities,
I LOVE YOU BECAUSE I KNOW NO OTHER WAY THAN THIS, . . .
So close that your hand on my chest is my hand,
So close that when you close your eyes I go to sleep . . . ”
Please God let her be ok!